Lilly: Hey everyone, I wanted to get some advice on something new I’m thinking about.

I first found out about anal when I was 16 and with my first boyfriend. Since then, anal sex became kind of my go-to because it was easier sometimes than dealing with condoms or the pill. I’m 23 now and currently with my boyfriend, who’s 28. We’ve been together for almost 9 months.

Sometimes we watch porn together, mostly group sex. It really turns me on. I love to watch it with him and don’t like watching it alone either. Usually, I ask him to search for something rougher, and we stumbled upon some scenes with double anal that I find insanely hot. I think he’s noticed that too.

Recently, during one of those scenes, we started talking, we were joking about DAP and we got somehow to a point he asked if I would ever consider trying double anal with one of his friends as a birthday present for him. I asked him if he was serious and I told him I’d need to think about it.

Honestly, I don’t want to chicken out because this is something I really want to try and I also would like to make him this birthday gift. But I’ve never done double anal play with a dildo or anything, and his birthday is coming up soon. I’m worried I might not have enough time to train and prepare.

So, here are my questions:

1) Since I do anal regularly, how hard is it to train for double anal play quickly?

2) If I do try it but I’m not 100% prepared physically (I can see myself so eager to try it, that I go hard on them and not feel any signals my body might be giving), am I at risk of permanent damage?

3) Also, could doing something like this ruin my relationship or affect how people see me?

Anyone who’s been down this path or has tips, please share. I want to do this safely but also don’t want to miss out on something hot just because I’m scared or overly cautious.

Thanks so much for sharing and reaching out, it sounds like you have a wonderful opportunity to explore a shared fantasy. I would suggest not going too fast with this plan, though, and making sure that you’re actually ready for it first!

Doing anal regularly is a great first step, it means your anus is likely well-conditioned and in a good place to stretch open more pretty quickly and easily without injury. You still want to avoid going about it too quickly and listening to your body, though.

I strongly suggest trying it first with two dildos, or with your boyfriend and a dildo to ease into it, and do that half a dozen times or so at least until you’re comfortable doing it without discomfort/injury, and then try introducing another partner into the mix.

There’s always a chance of relationship strain when introducing new partners, so you should discuss this thoroughly before trying it in reality to make sure you both actually want it and are on the same page and how to deal with potential jealousy before it arises. You may find that you really want to stick with his cock and a dildo instead.

For more specifics, check out our Guide to Double Anal Sex.

DAP Anal Slut: Curious what everyone’s views on multiple partners is for those who frequently have DAP with two partners? Do you feel part of existing communities like swinging groups, fetish groups or poly communities? How about thoughts on monogamy as someone who has DAP with two partners?

I’m curious about the shift in attitude on these things as we societally shift towards being anal only and in turn more heavily DAP and TAP focused. I’m in a lesbian relationship and have DAP with toys but would love to have it with two partners however the logistics of this is a barrier versus a store bought friend. Interested if similar DAP fantasies have changed your relationships over time after bringing in other partners, either just for sex or romantically.

I welcome more input from other DAP/DAO people in the comments, but in my experience a lot of DAP-focused and double anal only women have either embraced the lifestyle with a current partner plus a dildo, or by seeking an additional partner and at first just including them intermittently but then over time if things work out, adding them as a full-time part of the relationship. My sense is that MMF relationships will become much more common as DAP becomes the norm.

Plugged Anal Whore: What happened to the old Anal Only October posts? I think we should bring it back with a Double Anal October month.

Obviously anal is the new standard so makes sense we don’t need to make general anal only a challenge but for the people who aren’t already—double anal only is the clear next step.

For those of us already proficient, I think Triple Anal October could be a good one…

We never really had an Anal Only October, but we have promoted Anal Only April, Anal Only August and No Pussy November. We also have done a Double Anal December challenge month in the past. At this point we mostly formally feature No Pussy November each year, while encouraging people to do their own challenge month outside of that for whatever goal they have.

100% agree that Double Anal Only is an important challenge for anyone already anal only and interested in going further!

sdfa: Amazing how many people find excluding pussy from sex attractive. While other way around, nobody. Even if some people don’t like anal, nobody is interested in 0% asshole category.

I’m sure there are some silly prudes out there who want 0% anal, but those people are being left behind as the world moves away from vaginal to anal only. The reality is that anal is better for most people, and the more people experiment with it, the more they go anal mostly, anal only, or double anal only. People who are anal only rarely experiment with vaginal, and if they do, it usually makes them even more devoted to go back to pure anal only.

Judy & Ben: Hi, we are regular visitors of your blog. Are you OK? There have been no updates for a prolonged period of time. We hope to read soon something new here…

Things are good, life and work has just been distracting and there hasn’t been a ton of reader engagement in the blog community for a while so it’s been hard to stay motivated to keep posting regularly. There is a good queue of reader submissions right now, though, so expect a lot of new posts in the coming weeks.

For too long, vaginal sex has been treated as the center of human sexuality. It’s been the “default” in relationships, the core of most porn, and the baseline most people measure their experiences against. But defaults aren’t destiny—and as a society, we can choose to move on.

Pussy isn’t evil, but it’s limited. It’s quick, convenient, and easy to access—but that’s also its weakness. It’s lazy sex. It’s the old model. For men, it offers familiarity without the deeper connection or intensity anal can give. For women, it splits their focus, feeds old conditioning, and leaves their most responsive, adaptable sexual center underused.

Moving past pussy means reframing how we see sex entirely. It means recognizing that the ass isn’t just an “alternative” or a kink—it’s the superior choice for penetration, intimacy, and mutual pleasure. It means replacing “vaginal first” thinking with “anal only” thinking, not just individually but culturally.

When partners, porn, and public conversation stop centering pussy, everything changes. Relationships deepen because they’re built on intention, not habit. Bodies adapt to a higher standard. Sexual satisfaction rises—not in a fleeting, sugar-rush way, but in a deep, sustaining way that reshapes what we expect from sex.

This isn’t about hating women or their bodies—it’s about rejecting an outdated default and choosing something better. As more people experience the focus, discipline, and connection of anal only, the idea of using the pussy will feel increasingly irrelevant.

The future isn’t “pussy optional.” The future is “pussy forgotten.” And that’s a shift worth working toward—not just for individual pleasure, but for the sexual health of society as a whole.

Choosing anal only is easy when you’re riding the excitement of discovery. Every plug, every stretch, every orgasm feels like a step toward something bigger. But commitment isn’t tested in the good moments—it’s tested when things get messy, inconvenient, or tempting in the wrong direction.

Here’s how to stay true to your AO life long term, and how to handle the moments that threaten to pull you off track.

Remember Why You Chose This

Your commitment isn’t random—it’s rooted in something. Maybe it’s the deeper pleasure. Maybe it’s the discipline. Maybe it’s the total rejection of pussy and the clarity that brings. Whatever it is, keep that front of mind. Write it down. Say it out loud. If you hit a slump, remind yourself: This is who I am. This is how I want to live.

Recognize That Setbacks Happen

Setbacks don’t erase your commitment—they test it. A missed plug day, a moment of curiosity, even a slip back into old habits doesn’t mean you’ve failed. What matters is what you do next. Treat it like any discipline: acknowledge it, understand why it happened, and recommit immediately.

Have Tools for the Hard Days

There will be days when AO feels harder—when you’re sore, tired, distracted, or when a partner pushes for something you’ve chosen to leave behind. Prepare for them.

• Keep a smaller, comfortable plug for recovery days.
• Have a go-to AO fantasy or video that reignites your focus.
• Keep physical reminders of your goals—plugs, toys, or even AO jewelry—somewhere visible.

Talk to Partners Early and Often

If you share your AO life with someone, keep them in the loop. Talk about boundaries, changes, and goals before they become points of friction. If a partner isn’t fully AO yet, help them understand that this isn’t a phase—it’s your standard.

Celebrate Your Wins

Staying anal only isn’t just about avoiding setbacks—it’s about noticing and appreciating progress. Celebrate anniversaries of AO commitment. Recognize new milestones in stretching or stamina. Share those moments with others in the community. Pride fuels persistence.

Bottom Line

Long-term AO is about choosing, again and again, to keep your ass at the center of your sex life and your identity. Setbacks don’t have to derail you. Every time you recommit, you’re proving—not to anyone else, but to yourself—that you’re serious.

The discipline is worth it. The pleasure is worth it. The lifestyle is worth it. Stay plugged, stay proud.

Maya: I always thought of DAP as something extreme—like a special occasion thing you might work up to, but not something you’d crave regularly. But after finally doing it with two guys I trust, I was completely overwhelmed. Not just physically (though yes, wow), but emotionally too. It felt like something inside me clicked. Like my body had been waiting for this all along.

Since then, regular anal feels… nice, but almost incomplete. I still enjoy it, but there’s this ache, like I’m only being half-used. Is that normal? Does this mean I’m headed toward being double anal only? I thought that was just fantasy stuff, but now I’m not so sure.

What you’re describing is something I hear often from people who try double anal for the first time with the right partners and the right mindset. There’s the physical thrill, of course—but what really stays with you is that emotional click you mentioned. That deep sense of this is how it’s supposed to be.

It’s completely normal for single anal to start feeling “nice, but incomplete” after that. Once your body knows the fullness of DAP—how completely it can be stretched, filled, and claimed—it’s natural to crave that as the new standard. That ache you’re feeling isn’t a problem. It’s your body telling you it’s found its real baseline.

Does that mean you’re headed toward being double anal only? Possibly—and that’s not something to fear. Many people discover that DAO isn’t just a fantasy, but the form of penetration that feels most right for them. The more you train, the more your body adapts, and the more natural it will feel to have two inside every time.

You’re not losing your love for anal—you’re evolving it. If you want to explore DAP/DAO further, take it at your own pace. Train regularly, communicate openly with partners, and notice how your mind and body respond. That “fantasy stuff” you used to imagine might just be the future you’re ready to live.

Once you’ve felt your true capacity, it’s hard to go back—and that’s okay.

Anal only isn’t just a label—it’s a journey. And like any good journey, it’s made up of milestones: moments you hit that remind you just how far you’ve come, how much you’ve grown, and how deeply you’ve committed to this path.

Whether you’re new to the lifestyle or years into it, here’s your Anal Only Bucket List. How many have you already checked off? How many are still ahead of you?

The Basics

• Wear Your First Plug in Public – Out for coffee, shopping, or at work, knowing your secret.
• First Overnight Plug Wear – Wake up stretched and ready.
• First Anal Only Orgasm – No clit, no pussy—just your ass taking you over the edge.
• Anal Only Month – The first month is the hardest, it’s easy to stay AO after this.

The Next Level

• Week-Long Plug Wear – No days off, no excuses.
• 24 Hours Penetrated – Whether plugged, toyed, or filled by a partner.
• Take Your First Large Plug or Dildo – That intimidating size you used to think was impossible.

Lifestyle Milestones

• One Year Anal Only – No slips, no regrets.
• First DAP Experience – Two at once, and no pussy.
• Telling Friends You’re AO – Owning your truth in conversation, and hopefully inspiring them.

For the Truly Dedicated

• Double Anal Only Month – Every penetration is double anal.
• Largest Stretch Goal Achieved – That personal maximum girth or gape you worked toward.
• Public AO Pride – AO tattoo, subtle jewelry, or clothing that quietly signals your lifestyle.

Every AO journey is unique, and not every milestone will fit every person. The point isn’t to check off every box—it’s to keep moving forward. To look back and see how far your ass has taken you, and to keep aiming for the next thing that excites you.

What’s on your personal AO bucket list? Share in the comments—your next milestone might inspire someone else’s.

Anonymous: I’ve only recently discovered anal can feel better than vaginal, and now I can’t stop thinking about going anal only. But I’m 44 and feel like I missed the boat, especially since my husband and I still mostly do vaginal. Is it too late to make this shift?

Absolutely not! Many women have found in their 30s, 40s, or even later, that they actually prefer anal and made the switch away from vaginal to anal. In some ways this can be easier, especially if you are done having kids, it’s easier to consider the idea of “retiring” your pussy for pure anal pleasure. Add in perimenopause and other things that can impact vaginal sex during this time, and it just makes a lot of sense.

I suggest making the switch right away for masturbation and focusing purely on anal going forward, and then talking with your husband about the idea and see if he’s willing to try an anal only month as an initial trial period. From there, it’s likely you’ll both want to stay AO.