sexlovedesires: I need advice. So I’ve been curious about anal (never tried it) but my boyfriend has done it with his past gf & likes it obviously. I want to but I don’t . I feel it wouldn’t be special bc it’s my first and it’s not his. & I don’t know wether or no to try. I feel kinda disappointed. Is it worth it? (Btw I am the his first love as he is mine)

Your partner’s sexual history shouldn’t matter when considering whether it’s special or not. He’s with you now and sharing the experience of anal sex with him can be special regardless of whether it’s his first time or not.

Before you agree to having anal sex with him, try masturbating anally. Use your finger with some lube while rubbing your clit to start. You can also use a small dildo (have a special one just for anal, or use a condom on it if you also use it vaginally) or butt plug. Anal stimulation can feel great in general, but often when starting out is most noticeable during orgasm. It can feel strange when you first do it, but if you try it a few more times it often starts to feel really good (just like vaginal penetration). Don’t do anything that hurts. If it hurts, you’re taking things too fast.

If you like how it feels while masturbating, then consider having anal sex with him. You should be able to comfortably fit a toy the diameter of his penis up your butt before allowing him to have anal sex with you.

Anonymous: My wife and I r in our early 30s. I wasn’t eager to settle down (although I didn’t understand why) and agreed to get married on the condition we be 100% anal, including when she masturbates. Like others on here, I’m not into vag and love the mental and physical thrill of rough butt fucking. She agreed and it’s been great. My question: when it’s time for the sex talk w our sons and daughter, do we broach this topic or just let them figure it out on their own? I wish someone had to told me.

First, congratulations on having an awesome wife.

Second, regarding the sex talk, I think it’s fine to mention a preference for anal only as a viable option that there’s nothing wrong with, but it should probably be mentioned along with other things, e.g. some people have vaginal sex, some people regularly have both vaginal and anal sex, and some people only have anal sex. If you want to try and tip the scales towards anal, you can always mention its benefits, though it’s of course important to balance that with the importance of preparation and warmup, etc. for anal.

That’s just my personal opinion, because I would also have liked being told about the idea and it being a legitimate lifestyle long before I figured it out on my own. I’ll let others follow up with their own opinions.

Actually, there are none, other than a deeper and more satisfying sexual relationship. But that doesn’t stop people worrying, or others maliciously spreading false rumors about anal sex.

The idea certainly causes much anxiety, such as in this case:

Will having alot of anal sex cause problems for the woman later on in her life?

They have an excellent answer is this reply:

My wife just had her annual physical and I went with her. Specifically to discuss the fact that we started having anal sex since her last visit, and I wanted to make sure everything was OK.

After having anal sex 2-3 times a week for the last 9 months or so, including very vigorous and deep thrusting on my part, I can report that her doctor says her rectum and lower colon are in perfect health. Her doctor also said that anal sex is fine as long as plenty of lubrication is used. She also said that there are no studies that show any higher percentage of anal prolapse, loss of bowel control, etc., in people who receive anal sex than in people who don’t. Those maladies are a product of age and/or disease unrelated to anal intercourse.

The short answer, is to have as much anal sex as often as you’d like without any unnecessary worry about causes any harm.

Anonymous: So I’ve read here about others being turned off by vaginal or not liking how it looks or whatever. I’m the same, it feels unnatural. But I do like anal very much, it feels right, but I don’t get to have that as much as I want. And it creates complicated situations with girlfriends. I feel a little bad about having this need. How do most guys work through this? Will I always feel this guilt/awkwardness whatever you want to call it?

You absolutely should not feel bad about this preference, even though some people may misunderstand, take it personally, and unfortunately try to make you feel bad about it. Embrace your preference and don’t feel guilty for what you like. There are women out there who prefer anal sex as well, you just have to meet the right person.

lubeandanal: Confession:  I never used to like anal. I thought it was disgusting, and only porn stars did ut. How could it be enjoyable? It hurt!
But my husband started slow…a finger….then two….then a small vibrator….then a small dildo….then we bought my first plug. Gradually we’ve gotten to where my ass HAS to be filled with something when we have sex or im not satisfied! Even when i masturbate, i need my ass filled!
I now have a large collection of anal toys, and i love every second of having something in my ass!

Anonymous: Do you think if most women were approached/initiated in the right way doing anal only is a real possibility? Because I’d love a shot at this. Isn’t it a fantasy for most men? Another thing I’ve read on many of your links about how women can cum from just anal. Again, a real possibility? Any tips to make that happen as that would seem the best way to to convince someone that anal was better.

Everyone’s different. Some people just aren’t interested in even trying anal, unfortunately, and it’s unlikely they would do it even if you approach it a certain way. However, given a woman who is neutral on it, there is a likelihood she would enjoy it if properly introduced to it. Whether she’d be willing to go anal only is highly dependent on her individual preferences.

The answer of course, is a resounding yes. Most women are not only capable of enjoying anal sex, but also coming to like it more than vaginal.

However, it is not something you can switch to straight away, without knowledge or adequate preparation.

As this man finds out, if a woman is fearful, having been conditioned to expect the experience to be unpleasant then it takes care and patience to build up to actual penetration.

Hello. I’m 24 year old male and I have some questions for all women out there. You see, these last couple of months I have talked a lot about anal sex with my friend.
So they told me that they all practiced it with their girlfriends and that it was great- for them and for girls.
So, just the other day I have tried it to do it for the first time with my girlfriend. When I tried to penetrate her she screamed because she was in lot of pain and told me that we will never try anything similar again. She also told me that no woman can enjoy in this awful act. So, I started doubting in what my friends told me earlier about it.
So, I would like to know are there actually women who enjoy anal sex?

He is reassured by the many response, from both sexes, that woman can and do enjoy anal. Besides, it is becoming increasingly common, perhaps even the norm, that heterosexual relationships include anal play/sex of some kind.

Several responses from women, say that while they do enjoy anal now, initially they were uncomfortable because their partner rushed things, or did not use any lubrication.

Anonymous: I feel like the only guy in the world who hasn’t got to try anal yet 🙁 I keep hoping my luck will change. It’s tough as I’m turned on by girls assholes but not that much by pussies. I look at a lot of anal porn which kinda helps – but damn it looks good!! Am I honestly missing out on much? Is it really better for a guy like that say?

It really is better, and when done correctly can be better for women as well. For guys it’s tighter, differently textured, and looks hotter. For women, it can often lead to better orgasms (or can be the only way they can orgasm, sometimes).

Anonymous: I would like to know more about the blog and the person behind it. Do you have many followers? Do you have only anal sex? Do you get much negative feedback or are most people positive about the lifestyle? Lastly, is the blog just to share information or do you think other people will become interested when they hear about the anal only concept? Thanks.

The Anal Only Lifestyle blog has multiple people behind it who are regular contributors. Most of us either do live the anal only lifestyle, have for an extended period in the past, or are seeking to do so in the future.

We have nearly 700 followers at this time, while our pornographic counterpart, Anal Only, has over 11,000.

Feedback has been almost entirely positive, with only a very tiny bit semi-negative. Nearly everyone appears to at least be tolerant of people’s preferences even if they don’t personally understand them, and most are actually actively interested in the idea of giving up vaginal sex for exclusive anal, even if they’re unwilling to do it at present.

The blog is both to share information with others who have the same interests and let them know they’re not alone and that there are in fact many others out there of every gender with the same desires, and to introduce the idea to others and get them to realize the possibility and make them want it as well. Personally, that’s how I was introduced to the idea. I’d always liked anal but never considered the idea of anal exclusivity until I began reading about happy couples who had given up vaginal sex and were only having anal sex and loving it. I immediately knew that I wanted the same.

So, on that note, if anyone following has a story about an anal only relationship that they want to share, please submit it. You can do so anonymously if you want, but please get it out there so you can help others who want the same thing.

Take your time and I think you’ll get to like it! A friend of mine was like you, had tried and failed and after taking my advice she became an anal addict lol

From here [archive link]