Anonymous: I don’t like fucking the pussy at all or even playing with it. I’m not gay but all I want is the butt of the girls I have sex with. A lot of them don’t like that. Am I wrong for only wanting anal?
You are not wrong at all, but your preference for anal is not going to be shared by everyone and you need to respect those who aren’t interested in primarily or exclusively having anal, and find someone who is. (They’re certainly out there.)
Anonymous: Do you think society can ever evolve to the point that anal is considered default, and vaginal is considered strange and less natural?
In the shorter term, it’s likely that anal will become another equal component of a healthy sexual relationship for most people. It wasn’t too long ago that in much of western culture blowjobs were not something most people did. Now they’re generally expected by most people, and anal looks to be moving towards that as well.
Once that happens, and most people consider anal to be a legitimate form of sexual activity on the same level as vaginal, it will be a lot easier for people to accept the idea of anal only as a serious and appealing thing, and I think it may continue to evolve towards more of a widespread default at that time.
Anonymous: I love anal sex but am somehow married to my wife of over 3 years and she can’t take my cock in her ass. I have tried numbing creams and small toys. She hates trying and any bit of discomfort. What the heck can I do to get some anal?
If she’s willing to try anything anal again, spend a lot of time making it entirely about her pleasure. Don’t try anything penetrative at first, just ask if you can rub (and lick, if you’re open to trying that) the outside of her anus with a lubed up finger during oral and vaginal sex. No penetration at all, just external rubbing—and assure her of this. There are a lot of nerves in the anus and it can feel really good to have it externally stimulated, especially during vaginal/clitoral stimulation. If her only experiences with anal play so far have been painful or uncomfortable, she’s very likely going to be tense and fearful of further penetration, which will continue to make it painful. Beginning to associate that area with pleasure instead is a vital first step. But make sure you ask before, of course.
If she does enjoy this, make it a regular part of your routine. After a while, ask if you can try inserting the finger you’re using to rub her with. Don’t do this on its own, do it during something that’s already pleasurable to her, and possibly after she’s already experienced at least one orgasm in that session. For someone who is inexperienced, anal penetration can feel a lot better while while being pleasurably stimulated in some other way. If this works, build up to giving her an orgasm from oral/vaginal/fingering while also fingering her ass. Anal penetration during orgasm can often amplify its strength.
You can also do things like giving her a back massage that evolves into a butt massage and ends with you masturbating her to orgasm while fingering her anally. Again, she needs to know in advance that this is what you want to do and be okay with it. Never penetrate anyone anally without them being okay with it in advance—that’s the fastest way to get someone to lose interest in anal play.
From there, you could try a small butt plug during oral/vaginal, or anal beads which you pull out during orgasm.
Essentially, you need to focus on making the idea (and reality) of anal penetration appealing and pleasurable to her through very slow advances over a period of time. You shouldn’t even attempt actual anal sex with her unless she has become more comfortable with the feeling of anal penetration and is enjoying anal play. And then there’s the possibility that she simply doesn’t like it—not everyone does. A lot of the dislike comes from being improperly introduced to it, but not everyone is wired differently and some people just don’t get any pleasure from it. If she doesn’t like it, you’ll just have to respect that.
Anonymous: Are women (and people in general) that favor anal sex more intelligent than those who don’t?
I have never seen any scientific study done on this, so I do not know. I’m fairly sure it mostly comes down to personal preference and body differences, however.
All guys are different, just like all women are different, but it’s pretty much indisputable that anal sex feels better than vaginal sex for men.