Anonymous: I think I want to go anal only but it’s hard to make the decision. As women we’re taught that our vagina is such an important part of ourselves and it really seems like life as a woman centers around it in so many ways. So the idea of giving it up is scary but at the same time really freeing. What are your thoughts, and do you have any tips?
I’m glad to hear that you’re seriously considering going anal only. Naturally, I encourage it.
As you note, society remains very vagina-centric and women are often raised with the idea that their vagina is something very precious and central to their femininity—and it is. Women have the ability to get pregnant and give birth to children, and that is something that’s part of being a woman for many. But that doesn’t mean that it has to define who you are—a woman is so much more than her vagina.
The anal only lifestyle doesn’t treat the vagina as if it doesn’t exist, it acknowledges its important role for reproduction, but also recognizes that reproductive sex is a vastly minimal part of the sex lives of most people. As such, vaginal is best kept for what it does best: reproduction, while anal and oral can be enjoyed for what they’re best at: everything else.
So it isn’t about abandoning part of yourself or becoming “less of a woman”, it’s about choosing to have sex in a way that feels better for everyone involved, separating sex from reproduction and focusing purely on pleasure, and so much more.
You obviously want to do it—just make the commitment and decide to be anal only going forward. You won’t regret it.
