Message: The New Normal
Chris: My girlfriend and I have been anal only a couple of years now thanks to the blog. It was the best thing ever stumbling on this. At first it took a lot of persuading before she agreed to try and several times she almost backed out. But the more anal we did the less of an issue she made about it until eventually, she came to accept it as the new normal. We both love it so much more now and she even laughs at how she used to find excuses not to do anal.
I’m saying this because I do believe most couples would come to the same conclusion if they don’t give up. I think it’s mostly something in a woman’s mind saying she can’t do it. When you are actually doing anal only you eventually see all the objections are just artificial barriers.
It’s good for the relationship as a whole as even she now agrees it feels nicer and I’m happier because I get the sex I prefer.
Most of the reasons people give to not go anal only are an internal mental block or cultural myths not rooted in reality. That’s why my suggestion is always for people to just go and try it for themselves for 1 or more months, without a longer term commitment up front, and see how they actually find the experience from there. The majority of women become much more amenable to staying anal only once they have 1 – 3 months experience of not using their pussy and focusing on anal exclusively, and see the benefits of doing so for themselves and that they don’t actually miss their pussy as much as they thought they would, or that they enjoy the increased arousal of doing so.
Yes, it does take many months before they can move on and see what they are gaining by having anal exclusively. It was my experience that it was about a perceived loss, but when pressed she couldn’t really justify or explain it. When we talked about it at least I could actually explain my preferences while she couldn’t – much more pleasurable and I preferred the look and feel of her anus.
For most people, it’s all about habit and doing what they’ve always done and what they think everybody else does. A few months of purely anal can break that habit and open the mind.
Yeah lots of reluctance by many women to admit that anal can feel as good or better than vaginal. The same goes for making anal the norm or going completely AO. My take on it is that they feel it says something about them and how they are seen as a woman or by rejecting the sexual function of their vaginas they are somehow seen as something less. I don’t get it. As a man I think more highly of a woman who wants to do anal. When I’m with a woman I’m not thinking of her vagina at all, but it’s still too rare that they see that as a positive thing.