I’m going to split up this message so I can respond more directly inline to its different parts.

Hello once again. Thanks for answering my post from 17th April about my experiences during and after my second pregnancy.

At this point it’s kind of hard to say what it is I really want. I feel more than a little confused. I think my mood is lower than after my first child. Here’s the thing though: When I was pregnant I loved all the anal, it felt very good and it felt like the right thing to do at the time. I’m a big believer in listening to what your body tells you. And I really had a verging on unhealthy craving for it for the duration.

I’m biased in favor of the anal only lifestyle, naturally, so my responses and encouragement are going to share that bias, but I’m also biased in favor of mutual consent and desire to take part in this lifestyle.

Because you’re still adjusting post-pregnancy, and because both you and your husband loved being anal only until recently, I would suggest continuing to maintain your anal only routine together when you feel up to it even if your arousal hasn’t fully recovered yet, and seeing where things go from there. Your arousal will return, and I’m pretty confident your love for anal will as well. It’s a little bit of the “fake it until you make it” approach, but that can actually work quite well. And along the way, you’ll probably figure out whether continuing being anal only is what you really want or if you really do want to go back to vaginal.

Although I was getting gradually larger I also never felt sexier (which my husband commented on) while now the reverse is true. It all feels like a very unfair piece of bad timing that my husband is very affectionate, turned on and making very frequent advances while I’m not feeling the same. I admit to feeling some guilt over this. Is that bad?

It’s not at all uncommon or unusual in this situation. Be sure to keep talking with him about it and explain how you feel, and listen to him as well. Make sure to try not to make him feel bad for being affectionate and aroused while you aren’t. Try to work through it together and come up with compromises that work while you continue to adjust post-pregnancy. Try to identify what does make you feel more aroused and when and take advantage of that when you can. Otherwise, just keep moving forward and be patient.

I’m not sure if it’s just the lack of interest in any sex rather than not wanting anal. My husband is being very gentle and considerate and even more enthusiastic with foreplay etc than ever before.

Any tips for getting my drive back? And if we are making love 3 or 4 times a week is that too much anal to have safely?

For getting your sex drive back, just be patient and keep sticking with it, and you’ll get there eventually. It just takes time in most cases. Your body goes through a lot during a pregnancy, and everything doesn’t just go back to “normal” immediately after. It’s a process.

As for having anal sex 3 to 4 times a week, there’s nothing at all wrong with that so long as that’s a frequency that isn’t uncomfortable or painful for you. Listen to your body, and if it makes you sore or painful after or during to do it that often, try it a little less often, but if it’s working well for you, keep it up. Having frequent anal sex doesn’t have negative long term effects if you’re doing it safely and it doesn’t hurt and isn’t injuring you. Maintaining a frequent routine like that is in fact quite positive both for having anal sex and for your anal health in general.

I’m not sure if much of what I said was very helpful, but I hope it helped at least a little. Good luck!

daddysprincessdiana: My husband and I used to have anal be our main kind of sex that we had. I would wear a butt plug every day, and we would only have vaginal sex if we forgot what it felt like. Then in March last year it started to hurt. Really badly. And we had to stop. Since then we’ve tried every couple of months, but it’s gotten to the point where even my smallest plug hurts. Do you know what could have caused this or what I could do to make it stop hurting? I miss anal

I’m sorry to hear that, that’s terrible. What sort of pain is it that you’re experiencing? Is it a sharp, stinging pain, a burning pain, or something else?

It could be a hemorrhoid or fissure that hasn’t fully healed or keeps getting irritated again.

It could be a sensitivity to the sort of lube you’re using or one of its ingredients, which can cause a lot of pain for some people. If you’ve tried multiple lubricants and it even hurts with natural lubrication as well, that may not be the case.

It could be a combination of factors with one primary trigger initially as well combined with falling out of the routine and things that were once easy because you were more relaxed and in the habit of doing something are hard to get back into now even if the original issue has healed.

Ultimately, I would suggest visiting a doctor about the issue to get a better understanding of what the cause is and see how you can proceed forward from there.

It is actually a hot and woderfull and it could once highest sexual pleasure only if you do it right. Im not anal only but most of the sex i have only ass. I cum by viginal but only squirt by anal. I cant say when i first had my anal sex but since then it was the number one sexual pleasure for and the longest term my anal only was 4 months until some one said that if i do not use my pussy my clitories nerves may stop working something like that dont know even that is true or lies. Do you know anything about that because i was looking forward to go anal only since i was 18 but now this thing makes me concern.

That’s a complete myth that not using your vagina or clitoris will make their nerves stop working. You may find after a long time of being anal only that you don’t enjoy vaginal or clitoral stimulation as much because anal pleasure is superior for you, but it won’t change anything physically, it’s just a change of preferences, and there’s nothing at all wrong with that. After all, if you prefer anal and it’s all you end up wanting, then you wouldn’t want vaginal anyway.

Don’t let misinformation like that get in the way of your anal only dreams. Go for it, dive back in, go back to being anal only, and work towards breaking your 4 month record from before!

Anonymous: I need help, I desperately love ass to mouth. I’m afraid of getting an infection, so I want to stop doing it, but I cannot resist it.

I’m not a doctor, and this shouldn’t be taken as medical advice, but it is based on personal experience and conversations with others experienced.

Ass to mouth, especially if done with your own ass, and if you’re visibly clean, is a pretty safe activity for most people, especially if you have a history of doing it without any issue, I wouldn’t worry about it much. You enjoy it, it’s fun, and it hasn’t apparently caused you any harm. Unless an actual reason to stop doing it becomes clear to you, I’d keep enjoying it.

Anonymous: Are there medical reasons why someone can’t have anal sex? I’m a guy and have a fair bit of personal experience with anal sex but my gf is an anal virgin. We bought an anal training kit with three plugs in it and she can’t get beyond the smallest plug because she says it hurts too much. Any advice apart from the obvious like relaxing and using lots of lube?

Some people may have various conditions that make it more difficult, but most people can get to the point of enjoying anal eventually if they’re willing to put in the time and effort. For some people, that’s an incredibly quick and easy process, while for others it’s slow and challenging.

As a general rule, start where it’s not uncomfortable or painful for her. If she can use the small plug without it hurting, focus on that for now. Don’t advance to the next plug until she’s totally comfortable with this one. Combine some other things like rimming and light rubbing or fingering to help her relax. Add clit stimulation if she enjoys that and try to get her to start orgasming in combination with anal stimulation and/or penetration.

Then, when she’s comfortable with and enjoying the small plug, try the next size. If it still hurts, go back to the smaller one or try something a size in between (this could be a finger/thumb in some cases) before trying again. Go back and forth until the plug can fit in without pain. Repeat this process as needed.

Anonymous: My girlfriend and I have experimented with anal for quite a bit now; but she won’t take the plunge and actually have anal sex with me because she’s worried it’ll cause problems if it turns into a regular thing. Do you have any information or sources I can use to show her that she doesn’t need to worry about doing any damage no matter how frequently we do it as long as I warm her up correctly?

I don’t have any studies to cite (perhaps someone can respond with something) but I can cite personal experience as well as the experiences of many other people who have been having anal sex regularly for a decade or more, including some who have been in anal only relationships for extended periods of time (two decades in some cases), and have encountered no problems.

Anal sex done properly with appropriate lubrication and warmup, where it feels good and doesn’t hurt (and if it does start to hurt, you pause and adjust as needed rather than just pushing through the pain) simply doesn’t cause an issue. It’s like exercise for the anal muscles, and helps increase their flexibility, elasticity and strength. It doesn’t lead to incontinence or prolapse or whatever other myths people have about it. Even for people who do big toy play/insertions, long-term issues are rare to nonexistent.

Anonymous: is bleeding post anal something to be worried about? been doing it for about a year and it’s a reoccurring thing. (bit of tmi I’m sorry ) but bleeding a little after a big deuce was always the norm for me since i was a child so ive never been concerned but my boyfriend wants me to go to the doctor ?

It can be, but it really depends on the cause. Some people have hemorrhoids that get irritated and bleed, and that’s less of a concern, but if you’re regularly tearing and bleeding as a result, continuing to irritate that can cause more issues (small tears don’t take long to heal, but continued irritation can turn a tear into a fissure, which can take months to heal). You may want to consider a visit to the doctor just to be on the safe side and make sure everything’s fine.

Does it hurt after when you bleed? How often do you do anal? Do you find it difficult or painful when you do it? If there is pain, especially a stinging pain for a day or two after having anal sex, I would lean more towards it being a tear, and would suggest more warmup, wearing a plug more often to relax/train your ass more, and making sure you have enough appropriate lube whenever you’re doing anything anal-related. If there’s no pain, it may be something else.

slutty-sissy-slave-jessica: Is it save to wear plugs with thin necks (like jewel plugs) full time 24/7?

Yes, absolutely. The only concern with long term plugging is that the base is wide enough that it doesn’t slip inside unintentionally and that it stays comfortable. If it starts to hurt, you might take a short break or figure out what’s causing the pain/discomfort, but otherwise feel free to plug as often as you like. It won’t hurt you as long as you listen to your body and adjust as needed.

Bigger plugs with thicker necks are fine to wear long-term as well as long as they’re comfortable. It won’t cause issues, even long-term. It will help relax and “stretch” your ass, but anal muscles default to a closed state, so even if it can stay open at a very large size with a plug, it will close back in its resting state when not plugged.

Anonymous: I wore my butt plug to class for the first time today. Sitting there with it pushing against the seat while I tried to remain as attentive as possible made me sooo wet. I can’t wait to do it again. I’m thinking about wearing it in the shower and overnight tonight so I wake up a horny, dripping mess. Are there any problems with doing that? I’m fairly new to butt plugs.

Isn’t it so much fun to wear in public and feel your ass full and sensitive and occupying your attention?

There’s no problem with wearing a butt plug long term or overnight. If it starts to get really uncomfortable, you might take it out, but otherwise go for it. Sometimes, some people can’t go all the way overnight with one immediately and it can take a little practice, but try it and see how it goes!

odieballer: Do you have problems with hemorrhoids and stuff and painful shitting after wrecking your asshole the way you do? I always wonder about that with you or top stars like HKJ and proxy and others

bb-puta: no, i personally have never had hemorrhoids, painful bathrooms or any other problems with my ass!

The idea that anal, even larger/rougher anal sex and play, causes injury or hemorrhoids is more or less a myth. It can if you don’t listen to your body and take care of it, but if you use lube, warm up, and don’t do anything that hurts, you can do all sorts of things like double anal fisting and be totally fine. Gradual progress and increase of size is healthy and safe. Forcing things in and ignoring the pain is what gets someone injured. This applies whether you’re just getting started with anal or are an expert doing expert-level play.