Every article on anal sex which allows comments should start out repeating what this insightful individual said:

After reading the various replies on this thread you still aren’t understanding that it’s not just the men who like it and want it?
You sound like a high schooler between the Ewwww comments and thinking that him liking anal would turn him bisexual or gay. Did you know you can also get pregnant by sitting on a toilet seat?
If its not for you – fine. In a relationship do what ever makes the 2 of you happy. Anal isn’t for everyone but some people, including women, really enjoy it and even….gasp…ask for it!

At yourtango.com, Dr. Hilda Hutcherson, a gynaecologist believes:

more women should give anal sex a try

And also that:

Women who don’t enjoy anal sex, she says, are probably doing it wrong.

Read her sensible tips and advice, as well as her dispelling many of the myths about anal sex. Be sure to continue reading to page 2, and also many of the interesting comments also submitted to the article.

While there are still some negative perceptions of anal sex, from both men and women, in general attitudes are shifting little by little.

Even better, some people are seeing anal sex as a normal and natural expression of sexual desire, just like vaginal is, and therefore something to be embraced.

Just to take one example:

I’m a woman,28 and have to say that I have always let the guy I was with put it in there. And it’s not as bad as these ladies say,as long as the lady taking it relaxes and pushes out. And as far as the but “not being designed” for anal sex why do guys always check out my pert sexy butt as I walk by. They obviously want to put it in there that’s part of being a guy!!!

This was originally a reblog of a post containing a gif that no longer exists with a fictional scenario captioned below. The original post from Tumblr no longer exists, but the caption and response below remain valid. 

analsexonly: She was raised by ignorant parents who taught her that her asshole was a dirty and disgusting place that shouldn’t be touched or explored and that anal sex was terrible and painful and something no normal person would want. Ironically, that made her rebel and try it anyway, and that’s how she learned that she really preferred it to having her pussy fucked.

girlslikedeepanaltoo: Usually it’s not really parents that give this stigma. It’s our society as a whole. It’s guys just trying to stick it in us when we’re younger, the lack of preparing, the fact that it’s dirty or taboo. It’s other girls telling us we’re a whore for wanting it in our ass. It’s this idea that a girl is a whore if she wants sex AT ALL or in anything that isn’t straight up vanilla missionary for the purposes of childbearing.

Which is a bullshit double standard. We might not have a prostate, but anal is still fucking awesome.

This is one whore that says bend me over and just like this and slide your cock right up my ass. Please and thank you.

I’ll get off my soapbox now.

A discussion at goodinbed.com starts with a person asking why people want anal sex, what is the point of it, and expressing the mistaken view that women will only have anal sex when coerced by men.

Among the responses one woman says:

I am a woman who has recently discovered a liking with anal sex.

I had tried it with lovers in the past and it always seemed terrible. But there is something about it that seems more of an intimate experience than just vaginal sex.

In my opinion, woman are afraid of anal sex for quite a few different reasons that I have discussed with multiple people.
1. Anal Sex is for gay men only.
2. Its wrong because the Bible says it is.
3. I’m scared its going to hurt.
4. “Exit Only”.
5. They are content with what they are doing, and are afraid of trying new things.

Thanks to an anonymous follower for requesting this. It was a great idea, and I’m glad to be able to post this. If anyone has any other myths that should be added, either submit or reply and I can write a Part 2 later.

Myth #1: Anal Sex is Painful

The anus exists in a tight, compressed state when at rest, and you have to “flex” the muscle in order to loosen it, such as when you go to the bathroom. People just starting with anal sex have less control over their anal sphincter than those with experience, and may find it difficult to sufficiently relax it enough on their own to be able to fit a penis comfortably. This is why it’s so important for most people not to jump straight into anal sex and instead to slowly build up with smaller objects like fingers and toys. If anal penetration ever hurts, you’re going too fast and need to take things more slowly and use smaller objects initially. With enough lube and the right sized object for your present ability, it should not hurt. It might feel weird, because it’s a new sensation, but pain should not be involved. If it does hurt, stop doing it and try again later, more slowly. As you become more experienced with anal, you will gain greater muscle control and can relax at will, making it easier to accommodate larger objects without a lot of foreplay and warmup. One great way of relaxing the area before anal play is to have one or more orgasms just before trying to put anything up your butt.

Myth #2: Anal Sex is Dirty

A common argument by people who are unwilling to consider attempting anal is “but I poop from there!” The reality is, if you have a good diet with enough dietary fiber and do not need to imminently use the restroom, your rectum should be free of solid fecal matter. It only exits the sigmoid colon into the rectum when it’s time to use the restroom. As long as you go to the bathroom within an hour before, you are very likely to have an empty rectum. Taking a shower and scrubbing the anal area clean with soap can be a good idea right before sex, especially if you want to receive analingus. If you are very concerned, you can use an anal douche to flush out your rectum with warm water, but it is considered unhealthy to do this regularly as it may also flush out good bacteria that aid digestion. After anal sex, the participating penises and anuses should just be washed clean with soap and water and the penetrating males should urinate soon after to avoid bacteria causing an infection in their urethra, rare though it may be for that to occur.

Myth #3: Women Do Not Enjoy Anal Sex

It is a commonly repeated myth that only men get any pleasure from anal sex and women only do it, putting up with the pain and discomfort, to please their men. Nothing could be further from the truth. Most women who have experienced anal sex more than a few times enjoy it as much or more than vaginal sex. Clitoral stimulation is needed for most women to be able to orgasm during vaginal sex, with the actual vaginal penetration itself unable to cause orgasm. Anal penetration, however, can often cause orgasms directly, without any external clitoral stimulation at all, due to the internal structure of the clitoris sometimes extending to areas within the rectum, and even when women are unable to orgasm directly from anal, the orgasm from clitoral stimulation while receiving anal penetration is often greatly amplified and reported to be among the best kind of orgasms the women have ever had.

Myth #4: Anal Sex is Wrong or Unnatural

Because the vagina is the female reproductive organ, many people assume that it has to be used for sex, even when that sex is purely for pleasure and not intended for reproduction at all. They say nature intended sex to be had using the vagina, which in one sense is correct—but nature only cares about reproduction, while we care more about pleasure and intimacy with our partners. In general, these people are not resistant to receiving oral sex, even though that is “unnatural” by the same standard. People resistant to trying new things and not confident in the entirety of their body and sexuality can sometimes be quick to classify something out of the norm as “wrong”, “unnatural” or “perverted” because it makes them uncomfortable to think about it. It’s just a dismissive attack to try and make people feel bad for liking something. There’s nothing ever wrong about people’s personal preferences or trying new things with their own body or with other consenting adults.

Myth #5: Anal Sex is Dangerous and Causes Permanent Damage

There are many such claims, including that it causes anal incontinence, hemorrhoids, rectal prolapse, etc. If you approach it properly, use lube, do not do anything painful, and always make sure you’re warmed up enough beforehand, you will not cause permanent damage as a result of anal sex. Frequent anal sex can actually help you strengthen your anal muscles, giving you greater control over the area, not less—reducing your chances of incontinence later in life. Hemorrhoids can be caused by straining on the toilet as a result of an overly tight anus and insufficient anal control. Rectal prolapse can sometimes be caused by extreme anal play, but is incredibly uncommon as a result of regular anal sex unless there are preexisting conditions that likely would have resulted in rectal prolapse anyway—and there are many who engage in extreme anal play with no prolapse or other side effects either. The anus and rectum can stretch incredibly large without damage as long as you use sufficient lube and only increase it in size very gradually—and they return back to normal size and tightness within several hours.

Myth #6: Anal Sex is Gay

This is wrong on two counts: it first implies that there’s anything wrong with being gay, which there is certainly not, but it also tries to claim that a sex act that some gay men perform makes all male participants gay, even when they only want to perform it with women. Sex acts do not make a person gay, only who you want to have sex with. People don’t call men gay because they receive blowjobs from women, even though oral sex is more popular among the gay community than anal. Wanting to have anal sex with women doesn’t make you gay, it makes you someone who wants to have anal sex with women.

The wife initially admits she was all for it, but then has a change of heart as she worries it may mean he is gay.

This is often a worry brought up by people, but merely indicates that people react in a knee-jerk fashion, as all logic goes out the window.

Just as well that help is on hand for the wife with this sound advice:

it does not mean he is gay at all. Anal sex is another way for caring and trusting people to share a really close intimacy. My wife was not too excited at first… but we started slowly with light touching and some smaller objects. My wife enjoys receiving analingus and that brought out reactions from her body and mind that she could not hide… no one should force anything on you- but sex should be open and intimate… the sensations in that area are very intense… if you wire your mind that it is disgusting… then it will be highly disgusting to you… if you allow those feelings to be erotic you will find it a highly erotic experience.

Straight couples have been having anal sex since forever… gay men perform oral sex on each other, does that make a man gay if he hopes his wife will give him a BJ?

Just take things slow, let them be fun, and a little naughty.. and if you don’t like, then let your husband know that it is out of bounds. My wife was not sure, but let me tell you, she found out pretty quick that she liked it.

Read further here.

The husband goes on to say:

She told me that “normal” sex is painful, and I can tell she is in pain. She enjoys oral but will only allow me to penetrate her anally.
My question is that we are intimate 2-3 times a week (usually), and I worry that we may be doing damage to her rectum? Even if we use a lot of lube can damage be done?

The doctor starts off well in her reply:

I do know that with proper lubrication and relaxing technique, anal sex isn’t harmful.

However, she then becomes sidetracked by this obsession that this signifies that there must be something wrong with the relationship; that the wife is bored, lacks sexual desire or is somehow repressed.

It  never occurs to her once that maybe the wife chooses to only have anal sex because she enjoys and prefers it to vaginal.

Read the whole story here.

Anonymous: Something else I wanted to ask, but not enough space: I hear all the time about the proper way to do anal is to prepare, and you can’t just dive in there else you hurt her, and obviously sometimes it can’t be done because she has something up there already. Given all that, how do you make it work with anal only, and also kind of spur of the moment sex?

The need to prepare and take things super slowly is more important when starting out. As a woman becomes more experienced with receiving anal penetration, whether it be from penises, fingers or toys, she gains more muscle control over the area (contrary to the ridiculous popular myth that anal sex results in loss of muscle tone) and can relax her sphincter muscles at will to allow easy entry. You still generally need some sort of lube, but with an anally experienced couple you can just drop a little bit on and slowly slide right in, pain-free. It’s good to always err on the cautious side, and you can use a finger or toy up her ass during cunnilingus to help loosen her up before switching to full anal. Lots of women love butt plugs, worn either during foreplay or during the day to stay horny and a bit looser, making impromptu anal more feasible.

Most people can tell if they need to go to the bathroom, and notice it even more as they explore that area sexually. It’s generally not a big deal to go to the bathroom shortly before having anal sex. If you have a good diet, it’s fairly clean inside the rectum unless you need to go to the bathroom right then.

A woman writes about how she and her husband have discovered the joys of anal sex and how they now have anal sex most days:

My husband and I have been having anal sex for about three months now. We tried it after a friend told me she enjoyed it with her husband. I was a little surprised by this. I started thinking about it and asked my husband if he wated to try it. After four or five trys we suceeded. I had the most incredible orgasm I’ve ever felt. My husband said he never felt anything so intense as cumming in my butt.

This is a very special time for many couples, as this often re-ignites a more passionate sex life. It is understandable that some people will think there must be a catch, or a price to pay for this pleasure. For as she continues:

Is it safe to have so much anal sex? What will it do to my butt? Is it safe for him to cum in my butt? It hasn’t made me sick or anything. I just let it come out naturally.

As covered before, no permanent, long-term or irreversible damage can be done to the anus during the course of normal anal love-making, no matter the frequency. A temporary sensitivity, at worst, as would be the case with any sexual activity done within a short space of time.

As for semen deposited in the rectum; this is purely a matter of personal choice. Most people enjoy and would rather finish there, and it does no harm at all, though a small percentage of people do have an allergy to semen, but this would be the same with any contact with seminal fluid.

The many responses to her question confirm the same thing, including from couples who have only have anal sex.

The bottom line is that, as many couples have found, there is no such thing as ‘too much anal sex’. It needn’t be reserved for special occasions or rationed, but can be a totally satisfying and valid replacement for vaginal sex.

Read the whole story here.